Posted by Steve
Sunday, March 19, 2023 4:50 PM
So I decided to rank each role by their agents and give them points.
1: Valorjesus
2: Saint
2-3:. Redeemed/Excusable or Average
4-5: Bad characteristics but not too bad borderline narcissistic at worst
6-7: bad past/Borderline Psychopathy
8-9 Terrorist/Psychopath/Terrible Deeds/Irredeemable
10: litteral Demon
Duellists: We have one terrorist, one potential one, 2 douchebags, Reyna and somehow the ADHD Kid is the best one (I have ADHD I can say that) Evil meter: 9
Jett: Has no problem with murdering people, extremely toxic to her teammates and enemies and extremely careless (Brimmy's Stretching voice line exists for a reason) possibly lazy and doesn't take her duty seriously, possibly commited terrorism. 7.5 Evil meter
Raze: Completely Insane, doesn't take actual murder or dangerous situations seriously and is technically an ex terrorist, doesn't care about actually hurting people property or her own friends. 8 Evil Meter
Phoenix: Actually pretty good, doesn't care about murder AT ALL, is careless and irresponsible, no evil characteristics but he casually breaks the fourth wall lol. 5 Evil meter.
Edit: I forgot he burned down a school. Evil meter 7
Yoru: Possible Gang or crime syndicat ex member, has a history of crime, terrible moral compass, selfish, irresponsible and overall POS. Evil meter 6.5
Neon: Do you know what a Autistic 4 Year old with superspeed an electro shocker and no father figure is? Evil Meter 3
Reyna: Mass murder, possible terrorism, enjoys murder, commits war crimes, extremely selfish, mocking and manipulative and potentially if the bible is real in the valorant Universe (Or basically any other religion with afterlife) she is practically torturing every soul she consumes for eternity, racist, only good characteristics is her being a mentor to both Neon and Gecko. I think we can give her a 10 on the Evil meter
Sentinels: 2 Terrorists, one saint and someone who might just be as a bad as a terrorist, this is getting better by the day. 9 (Sage carry)
Killjoy: Doesn't give a shit about people's live aslong as they aren't scientists (Voice Lines and Lore contradiction momento) possibly arms Terrorists or is a Terrorist, either way she gives very dangerous shit to random mustache twirling terrorists (probs for money), also tried to start beef with cypher for some reason aka the guy who probably knows her entire family + her adopted grandmother and so i'l give her Recklessness and mockery too, hurt people in the past and did not give a shit. Evil meter 8 because of the arms dealing and the finger incident. Edit: She didn't specify that she didn't try to make up for the finger or that she wasn't sorry so I'm gonna tell you to ignore that point, I'm also lowering her score to 8 so now she is on the same plane as her gf, partly since part of the blame is on Brimmy due to him allowing that in the first place.
Chamber: All of the above + simp + the terrorism is confirmed + genocide and causing a dimensional war + no bitches. Evil meter 10 because he forced us to play on fucking fracture that piece of poop.
Sage: Respectful, gives a shit about murder (finally), actively tries to help people around her and anger issues. Good meter 2 (She is awfully aggressive and unmerciful sometimes also she doesn't do that much on a large scale).
Cypher: Has pictures of children on his PC for blackmail, probs sold people, protects several terrorists, blackmail, hacking, does not ducking care about anything, weirdly wholesome sometimes, then again his ult literally drills a hole into people's brain in order to reveal everyone's location, lost his family, PTSD, potentially suicidal, Stalking. Evil meter 9.5
Initiators: One Turkish blackmailer, one Terrorist, 2 average Joe's and the Sexbot 6000. Middle 5 of Evil/Good meter
Fade: her ability is literally PTSD, fear and blackmail what else do I need to say (I have no idea about her lore lol don't lecture me pls because I am scared) Evil meter. 7
Breach: 1 Man payday gang, the only reason he's in the VP is because Viper and Cypher blackmailed him. Evil meter. 7.5
Sova: Respectful, gives a shit about murder and is only rarely smug, brave and selfless (Shooting the dart despite fear in the Fade cinematic). Good Meter. 3
Skye: Gym bro but cringe, also Rambo for some reason, still her Reyna voice line alone warrants a death sentence. Evil meter. 5 because apparently she enjoys hunting humans? Very disrespectful, hostile and fucking cringe. Good meter. 4/cringe meter. 11
KA/YO: Bro is a fucking robot designed to murder racist demigods from a different fucking dimension how tf am I supposed to rate him. Evil meter 5
Gecko: He probably played Roblox or fortnite, he is kinda weird on this list, I mean thievery but then again he is actually kinda sage level on murder. Il give him a meter of 3
Controllers:. Real chill aside from viper so il give them a good meter of 6 despite the actual Demon. (Viper smoker diff)
Brimstone: Kinda average, doesn't do bad shit, wants to protect his team, is a wholesome boomer and hates black peo- uhhhhhh brimy thicc butt. Good meter. 3.5 Edit: He allowed Killjoy to make WMD's so il have to add some points
Omen: big surprise but he's a 3, he doesn't do that much bad shit and is actually pretty chill and depressed lel, most of the base shit he actually does is excuseable and he is more often than not an actual victim.
Viper: War crimes, Terrorism, Helps Terrorists, blackmail, murder, enjoys murder, enjoys torture, gave the worst ever rejection to chamber (not even he deserved that) but everyone loves her because they simp for her and honestly I can't even blame them lol. Evil meter. 10
Astra: a bit obnoxious sometimes but isn't too bad. Food meter: 4
Harbor: Apparently never killed anyone and only stole once because he fucking felt like it lmao. Evil meter. 5
Edit: Unless you can pull off a Saul Goodman level of defense I will not lower Reyna's rating, she is actually fucking racist
Edit 2: Reyna might just not be racist, I mean she might be but after thinking about it it's a large probability that she just fucking hates killjoy since most of the racist shit she says is against killjoy
Edit 3 (final): I've been thinking about how I should change the list based on people's comments and I have decided that I'm gonna redo it, but I will take heavy bias from the comments since I have realised that some of my ratings are indeed kinda unfair (Phoenix, Jett Killjoy) However I'm not promising anything because I am very unreliable at times so of anyone new reads this list I would recommend not to take it too seriously since most of my arguments have been heavily disproven in the comments. Spoiler: I don't think I will lower Reyna's rating doe despite the fact that she did setup sanctuaries or at least won't put her under a 9 Edit 4 (Super final): Just forget about this list I don't care anymore I tried to be funny and entertaining and tried to spent some down time by arguing but that is not wanted here (Wich is completely normal, acceptable and okay) I honestly doubt I'm gonna redo the list.
References
- https://www.reddit.com/r/VALORANT/comments/11un43r/most_valorant_protocol_agents_are_surprisingly/
- https://reddit.com/11un43r
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